Friday, October 26, 2012

Volatile moods

I can't take it anymore. This city. These streets. These buildings. These bridges. These cars. This house. This lack of activity. This lack of excitement. This static scenery everyday.

There is no greenery worth looking at. Nothing is lush. All the trees have a carpet of dust on them. The green is dull. There are no hues.

There are too many people. There is too much noise. There are too many shops. There are too many signals. There is nothing to do. There is no simplicity. There is no beauty.


It's claustrophobic. It's nauseating. It's disgusting.




Thursday, October 11, 2012

Jessica Ghawi


It's been two months now since I read in the paper about one of the victims of the shooting at the Dark Knight screening, Jessica Ghawi. She caught my attention because of what the article stated. Ironically, she had escaped open gunfire at the Eaton Mall only 20 days prior to the fateful day. The article mentioned a blog post she published after having survived the first shooting. I made a note to read it but never got round to doing it. But today, I did.

A Run On of Thoughts, the blog that she maintained, opens to her last post; The one speaking of her near-death experience. Reading that made me realize how much for granted we take each waking day of our lives. How lucky we all are to have been given another day. When we put something off for another day, what's saying we'd actually have that day? Life is so daily, but still, so unpredictable. Death is inevitable, unavoidable, but we never know when it's lurking around the corner. Should we never take steep turns then? Should we never skid off a cliff? Should we never unbuckle our seat belts? 
But more than thinking about when, where and how death awaits, I really feel for Jessica. When she saw through that first shooting, she was snatched away from the jaws of death in the nick of time. She must have felt like she was given a second life. She was barely given the time to assimilate what she had been through and change the way she wanted to. Her outlook changed, but did she really have the time to live that change? To begin to appreciate all those around her? 
How scary it must be to look at an injured person lying on a stretcher- bloody clothes, crying their heart out, staring death in the face - and thinking that could have been you. 
Oh so many ifs, buts and phews! 




Saturday, September 29, 2012

Carl Akeley

Carl Akeley was a taxidermist. A taxidermist with inordinate amounts of perseverance, passion and patience. A man who redefined the purpose of taxidermy and made it an acknowledged art form.
Working at the American Museum of Natural History, Akeley worked on a plan to build the African Hall. It would depict lives of animals of the great African wilderness as they truly are and not as a figment of human imagination.
He had a special love for elephants. These large, gentle giants were the center of his art through his life. He had many testing expeditions to Africa in search of the perfect specimens to shoot down. He would acquire large males, females and young calves. On being shot, their skins were painstakingly removed and cured for use. A master in his own line, Akeley kept working on better methods of taxidermy. He would often completely change his methodology and strove to share his knowledge with others. He was keen on projecting taxidermy as an art form. He created some of the finest specimens ever produced. Renowned scholars and artists highly commended and validated his work.
Akeley came to be a close friend of the then President, Theodore Roosevelt. He accompanied Akeley on one of his expeditions and even shot one of the elephants that stands today at the museum. It was on this expedition that they acquired a small elephant family for another display.
Akeley also worked extensively with gorillas in his later years and they inspired him to build a moving picture camera especially to record African wildlife. It was his quest to prove that gorillas were not the easily-angered, dangerous and violent creatures they were always made out to be. He was genuinely annoyed when a specimen of a charging, teeth-gnashing gorilla was presented to the museum. He shot a number of gorillas for his own creations. He also went on to be the first to record gorillas in their natural environment.

Akeley faced numerous near-death experiences with the animals he hunted. He had been attacked fiercely by both elephant and gorilla. But he never let these incidents keep him from continuing on after them.
Although Akeley wasn't alive to see through the end of his dream project of the African Hall, his close colleagues and his wife completed it for him. Today, known as the Akeley Arfican Hall, it stands with its life-like specimens against realistic painted backgrounds. Over two million people honour this hall every year through their visits.

Carl Akeley was a great man, a perfectionist in every respect and a pioneer in his field of science. But I refrain from being full of praise for him. He was looked up to for his love of animals. He was angered to hear of animals being hunted down. This amuses me. How was what he did proving his love for animals? He shot down numerous elephants, including calves and group leaders, breaking up their families and dismembering them; just so they could be reconstructed for human viewing pleasure. Study of anatomy is one way of looking at it. But I ask myself, was there no better way?
Elephants are perhaps, the most emotional of all mammals. To them, every member of the family matters and is loved. Even the natural death of one of their herd calls for a long mourning. The sudden death of the most important links of their herd, including their young ones has the most heart-breaking impact on the herd. To be able to kill so many, without having a conscience to stop you, is an extremely selfish ability. The love for his work far exceeded his love for nature. I wouldn't sympathize with him for the injuries he acquired from an agitated elephant. I would sympathize with the elephant and its entire herd for having to endure such cruelty. Just as the elephants suffered at his hands, so did the gorillas. Gorillas are gregarious animals that are highly dependent on their alpha male leader. He is a symbol of security for them. These males were Akeley's main target and was the first gorilla he managed to shoot; a large, silver back. This caused an  immense outcry- an actual, sulking outcry from the females of the group. This first experience didn't prick him, it made him go forth and shoot two females and a baby.
The results of these killings may be beautiful artworks that spreads knowledge about animals; but was it really worth all the pain and death? Does that justify what Akeley did? Does that make him different from hunters?
Shooting of animals shouldn't be influenced by their populations. It should be influenced by an inner conscience. This conscience was lacking in Akeley. He was obsessive about his work, for a need to do better. The fact that he was never satisfied and always wanted to push himself further, just lead to the death of more and more animals. He turned elephants into guinea pigs.
He was, in my eyes, a hypocrite. And delusional about his true passion. It is important to have perspective. To be aware of your actions and be responsible for them. Akeley neither thought he was doing wrong, nor took any responsibility for what he did. All he took was praise of the highest order and large monetary gifts that allowed him to carry on with his sinister work.
There's nothing more valuable than life. Life of a fly, life of a wolf, life of a monkey, life of a whale. Humans must come to terms with the fact that we cannot play God. It is not our prerogative to decide who deserves to live and who doesn't. All life must be respected, must be cherished and nurtured. And if not these things, in the least, should be left at peace. Each one unto itself. Nothing is more precious than a life.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Off the top of my mind

I can't believe how long it's been since I last blogged. There seems to be a dearth of things to say. Or maybe I talk too much and run out of things to write about. Either way, something's got to change. And so here I am, writing an article with absolutely no topic in mind.
I seem to be going through a series of phases in quick succession. There was a period when I loved the company of like-minded, fun and interesting people. Now I seem content even without it. I'm starting to realize the importance of some 'me' time everyday again. It felt good to finally get back to reading. It felts good to dance again. It felt good to dust off my diary and make my first entry in 3months. It felt good to take my camera out and get some good shots. And all this without having to compromise on my friendships. Why then, was I depriving myself of these little, easy joys for so long?
I want to start being more organized. Get my timings straightened out. My life is turning into one wherein 24 hours just doesn't suffice. I hit the sac every night thinking of five things I would've liked to do which I didn't. I resolve, with you as witness, to make that change.
On a lighter note, it has finally begun to rain again! The last two days have been wet ones with at least a drizzle in the air. The cracked, dense clouds that filled the sky yesterday took my breath away. It filled me with a squirmy happiness. During the day, the trees were glistening green, with their barks a deep brown. The air felt heavy with the full clouds breaking overhead. The chilled breeze on my face and neck was welcoming after the endless days of heat. My wet shoes and socks clung to my feet.
The feeling of being warm and dry after being cold and damp all day was heavenly. Much better than being safe and dry all along.
Here's what I memo'd last night-- ' Now I sit at my window, looking into the inky-black sky; the pitter-patter of the raindrops clear on the empty road. A cold wind makes me shiver, but I like it. I'm in a strangely pensive and peaceful place. A sense of unknown happiness. I'd like to walk this lonely road with a close friend. Walk in silence, just knowing we're there together, sharing the tranquility around us, soaking in the rain and calm.'